You may have noticed the badge that I have added to my blog, the very pretty one that reads, One Thing, Be Brave. So simple, are these words, but how hard they can be to follow.
I found Jessie's blog last week and without any second thoughts, I joined her in the commitment to be Brave. After all , when I started my own blog, one of my statements and great desires was to rid myself of fear. I wrote about fear way back on Dec. the 21st. Knowing that it was the number one thing that was holding me back. Holding me back, but why, what am I afraid of?
So many things :
I guess the # 1 fear is, can I do this ?
#2- what if I can't
#3- rejection (no more need be said about that)
#4- will it hurt ? my heart & soul
#6- and yes, I must say this, it is a reality , CAN I MAKE A LIVING , DOING MY OWN ART ????
#7 - will I let the people who Love me down ?
O.K. :) that is my list. It really is not as long as I thought it would be and I really thought about this. I am sure that if you are an artist & you are reading this, you can totally relate to my list. So, this was very good. I now have written down the things that scare me.
# 7- Is very important to me. Because, I have been an artist my whole life and I am blessed with the most wonderful people, who are wanting only the best for me. They have seen my art for a very long time and can not believe I am not the" most successful artist in the world!", ( that is not what they think, but some times it feels that way.)
Now lets be real. These are the family and friends who , and I so blessed by this, that REALLY LOVE me !! So, back to reality, what they see is a good thing. Because, I will of course never be the most amazing artist in the world. But, they are right in that, I should at the very least be able to make a living with " my own art".
I say my own art, because, if you have read my blog, you will know that I have had the great pleasure to paint for others professionally. As a scenic painter. I felt very powerful as an artist.
I could look at the designers elevations, and would know right away how to handle what they wanted. I could take non- painters and walk them threw what had to be done. I could teach as I completed the work for the show. I could.... and this is very important... paint in front of crowds of people. I loved it very much. I look at movies to this day as a scenic, one that I would have loved to work on was Nanny McPhee , (I am sure I spelled wrong) That was a most magical movie. Anyway, I also love my own art. VERY much
So, what holds me back, when I do my own work? Where is the confidence ?Where is the girl that can stand in front of a crowd and paint, with so much joy ? When you paint scenery, you are never alone. Unless it is 1:00 in the morning .
I have done many a portrait.
Many a interior design job. Faux Finish , marbre, was my favorite.
This is what I will be working on.
My first job is to work on TIME. I have learned from Lovely Jessie to is to have a montrah ,
Mine to start with is " THERE IS PLENTY OF TIME "
sounds simple, but , I feel I am always saying
"I need to slow down time, "how can it be today ?
Things are going to fast for me. "
So , I am now enjoying, TODAY, every last minute of it, and I have plenty of time !
What I am doing today that is Brave ?
I am going to introduce myself to Jessie , who is the lovely lady that inspired this post.